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From tamsun!bcm!cs.utexas.edu!qt.cs.utexas.edu!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!cis.ohio-state.edu!pacific.mps.ohio-state.edu!linac!att!walter!qualcom.qualcomm.com!cancun!rdippold Fri Feb 7 13:00:28 CST 1992
Article: 15464 of rec.humor
Path: tamsun!bcm!cs.utexas.edu!qt.cs.utexas.edu!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!cis.ohio-state.edu!pacific.mps.ohio-state.edu!linac!att!walter!qualcom.qualcomm.com!cancun!rdippold
From: rdippold@cancun.qualcomm.com (Ron Dippold)
Newsgroups: alt.politics.correct,talk.politics.misc,rec.humor
Subject: Politically Correct - The Year in Review
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Date: 22 Jan 92 21:59:45 GMT
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John Leo of USN&WR has done an excellent job of cataloging some of the
most egregious examples of Political Correctness in 1991. Some are
just ridiculous, others are downright hilarious and stupid. Some are
petty, because PC excells in turning the petty into a cause.
HOW MANY RACISTS CAN DANCE ON A PIN?
A knotty problem in PC theology arose at the University of Cincinnati
when a group of Arab students were taunted during a gulf-war rally.
The Student Senate condemned the offenders for racism, but that
criticism could not apply to the sole black student spottdd in the
crowd because the official administration handbook says that only
whites can be racist.
What to call a black who shouts "Arab, Go home!"? An Egyptian
student, Khalid El-Shazly, had the answer. Just call him a
"European-influenced African." Theological problem solved.
AND THE MINKS ON MY WIFE'S COAT ALL COMMITTED SUICIDE
The Eddie Bauer catalog offers pitch-saturated kindling wood "felled
by lightning or other natural causes."
DEAD PAINTER HARASSES PROF
Nancy Stumhofer, English instructor at Penn Stat'es Schuylkill campus,
has been sexually harassed by Goya's famous painting, "Naked Maja."
Any picture of a nude female, she argued, "encourages males to make
remarks about body parts." The offending picture had hung on the same
classroom wall for 10 years before it began harassing Stumhoffer. It
has been exiled to a student center, where it is presumably on probation.
EXCITING YEAR AT BINGHAMTON
The little-known State University of New York at Binghamton had a
big-league PC year, comparable to a few weeks at Stanford or Oberlin.
At Binghamton:
* A student was charged with lewd and indecent behavior for posting
two Penthous centerforlds on his dormitory door. (A student panel
found him guilty, but the administration later dropped the charges).
* As part of freshman orientation, new students were divided up into a
"wheel of oppression" to show how minorities are held down in America.
* Pipe Dream, the university newspaper, reported that one example of
alleged sexual harassment in the economics department was this
compliment: "She's so smart, and pretty too."
* A mob of 200 students, apparently under the impression that a
white-supremacy rally was going on, invaded a lecture hall,
brandishing sticks and canes. They harassed the speaker, calling him
a "white dork devil," broke a framed picture he was showing to the
audience, and punched a student outside the hall. Actually, the
speech, sponsored by the non-PC National Association of Scholars, was
on conditions in Berlin.
NEW WORD ALERT
"Phallocentrism," a feminist term, has merged with the
PC/Deconstruction epithet "logocentrism," to form the new jawbreaking
word for overmacho, overrational [!!!] white males known as
"phallogocentrism." Coming next year: phallologoeurocentrism.
WHY THE FIRST AMENDMENT, AS WE KNOW IT, MAY BE DOOMED
"My essential point is that the First Amendment does more for men
than it does for women by protecting speech that supports patrimony"
-- Law Prof. Mary Becker, U of Chicago Law School
THERE GOES 'MAN AND SUPERMAN'
It's "weeding," not "censoring," when books are permanently removed
from the shelves of the Mildred Magowan School library in Edgewater
Park, NJ. "Read About the Policeman" was weeded because the offending
volume should have said "police officer." "The Negro in America" was
pulled because it should have used the more correct "black" or
"African-American." "I don't want you to think we are censoring
books," protested librarian Martha Palmieri, adding that many books
simply have to go "due to racial, ethnic, and sex bias." The
Philadelphia Inquirer has reported that "weeding" is taking place
across New Jersey and Pennsylvania.
INDIANS JUST DON'T GET IT
At the College of William and Mary, a movement to change the nickname
of sports teams from the Tribe to something less offensive to Indians
ran into a discouraging obstacle: An enterprising reporter for The
Remnant, a conservative campus newpaper, interviewed the chiefs of all
of Virginia's resident Indian communities and found that every one of
them like the Tribe and wanted to keep it as the college nickname.
ARIZONA BATTLES NERD OPPRESSION
The Diversity Action Plan of the University of Arizona is concerned
with discrimination against the students because of "age, color,
ethnicity, gender, national origin, physical and mental ability, race,
religion, sexual orientation, Vietnam-era veteran status,
socioeconomic background or individual style." understandably, the
general idea is to get behind everybody who is not a straight white
male, but wait - what is "individual style" doing on this list of
victimizations? In response to a telephone query, "diversity
specialist" Connie Gajewski explained that this category would include
nerds and people who dress differently. "We didn't want to leave
anyone out," she said.
FREE AND OPEN DEBATE, PC-STYLE
The highly correct University of Michigan sponsored a three-day debate
on PC. Taking no chances, the sponsors invited 21 speakers who either
favor PC or deny it exists [seeing no contradiction...] and three
speakers who oppose PC, then labeled the conference "The 'PC'
Frame-Up: What's Behind the Attack?"
GOODBYE COLUMBUS
* The city of Berkeley has canceled Columbus Day and will celebrate
October 12 as Indigenous Peoples Day.
* Myths about Columnus may not be studied or discussed at the
University of Cincinnati. It's Student Senate has declared the
university "a Columbus-myth-free campus."
EUPHEMIZE! EUPHEMIZE!
* The University of Wisconsin at Madison's multicultural center in
Sellery Hall is now called the Center for Cultural Enrichment.
* At the University of Michigan, doling out jobs by race and gender is
known as "enhancement." ("Too often in recent years we have seen
faculty searches that are literally 'replacement' searches rather than
'enhancement' searches" - from "The Michigan Mandate," campus bible of
diversity-speak.)
* The new term for politicized teaching is "the scholarship of advocacy."
WITCHES IN THE NEWS
* Not one single witch was named to the committee planning this year's
300th anniversary commemeration of the infamous witch trials in Salem,
Mass. Laurie Cabot, the official witch of Salem, called this shocking
snub "a hate crime."
* Feminist witch Margot Adler, dressed in orange and black for
Halloween, said New York City has telephone covens, made up of
stay-at-home witches who do magic ovr the phone. Ms. Adler, who does
not like to be photographed with brooms, works as a cultural and
political reporter for National Public Radio.
POSSIBLE NEW NAMES FOR INCORRECT FOOTBALL TEAMS
Washington Reskins: Washington Native Americans
Dallas Cowboys: Dallas Bovine Persons
Ney York Giants: N.Y. Spatially Challenged Individuals
AND WE THOUGHT IT WAS ABOUT WATER!
At the Smithsonian's first genuinely PC art exhibit, a painting of
cowboys defending a water hole was said, in a press release, to
reflect "the plight of an embattled Anglo-industrial elite in an era
of strikes and widespread immigration."
A MILESTONE IN SEXUAL HARASSMENT
Richard Hummel, professor of chemical engineering at the University of
Toronto, said his sexual-harassment case cost him and his university
more than $200,000 in costs and fees. Hummel was convicted in 1989 of
"prolonged and intense staring" while swimming in a university pool.
Barbara Amiel, a columnist for Maclean's, described the case as "the
utter debasement of the genuinely serious nature of sexual harassment."
CAN IT BE HIS EQUIPMENT?
Jan Kerkhoven, a male feminist and a doctoral student at the Stanford
School of Education, was barred from a class in feminist studies. As
the Stanford Review reports it, the department said that the Feminist
Studies 203B was oversubscribed. Nonsense, Kerkhoven said: "Nineteen
students enrolled, and I was the only one excluded." Kerkhoven
acknowledges the perasiveness of male dominance and the oppression of
women. That is the Correct view, but he also wanted to take a wider
"humanist" perspective and discuss the dehumanization of society
(i.e., males and females). That was incorrect. He quoted the class
lecturer, Susan Krieger, as saying that he "didn't have the right
commitment to a gendered outlook."
ONLY WHITE GUYS CAN READ THIS ITEM, SINCE IT WAS TYPED BY ONE
Ms. magazine has a new rule: Articles about lesbians must be written
by lesbians.
WORDS AND OTHER OFFENSES
* The Asian American Journalists Association issued a pamphlet saying
that reporters should never use the word "industrious" to describe
workers or students of Asian-Pacific heritage. Other dangerously
stereotypical and off-limits words for Asian-Americans included
"reserved," "quiet," "philosophical," "serene" and "smiling."
* At the College of WIlliam and Mary, guidelines exist to nonsexist
language said that the new term for "unwed mother" is "mother."
"Kingpin" becomes "key person," "Truman's widow" becomes "Bess Truman"
and the phrase "male chauvanist," apparently redundant, is simply
"chauvanist."
* Other words banned last year include "Lazy Susan" (offensive to
woman, particularly women named Susan), "my wife," (changed to "my
partner"), "niggardly" (sounds like a racial epithet [to the
ignorant]), and "beat the drums" (slur on Native Americans).
--
When God endowed human beings with brains, He did not intend to guarantee them.